!!!!

I JUST WROTE AN EMAIL TO MINK STOLE, ASKING HER IS SHE COULD HELP ME WITH MY HAIR!!!!!!!!

Glub Glub

I'M GLAD SO MANY PEOPLE COMMENTED ABOUT MY HILARIOUS "NINE INCH SNAILS" FIND....TOUGH CROWD!!!

In the past few days I have:- seen the new 3D Jonas Brothers movie
- dropped my hairbrush in the toilet, more than once!
- watched my very first full episode of Star Trek: TNG
- visited hell on earth (ServiceOntario office at College/Bay)
- experienced brunch at the Cluck, Grunt, and Low (sttiiillll drrroooooollling, yo)
- surpassed my fear of eating sauerkraut
- watched this clip more than I have ever thought possible

blog

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Searchers fee for this one too!!!

So there are more than a few "formal events" that I have to attend in the next few months, and I need some assistance tracking down a hairstyle.
I was rewatching Pink Flamingos yesterday, and it struck me that Mink Stole has perhaps the most desirable hair on the planet...and the particular style I'm looking to recreate doesn't seem to be on the internet - ANYWHERE.

If you're familiar with the movie - it's the scene where she, and Raymond are sucking each others' toes in bed....WANNAFINDMEASTILLOFTHATSCENE!?!?!?!??!?!!

HELP ME FIND THIS FABRIC!!!!!!!!!!!

I am desperate to make curtains from this fabric!!!
I WILL EVEN PAY YOU A FINDERS FEE!!!!!!
TROLL TOILE!?!??!
Someone knows what they're doing on this planet!!!!!!

Home Depot Is For Lovers

Inevitably, anywhere you went last night you were crammed to the tits in a small space with overly lovey-dovey couples.
EXCEPT FOR HOME DEPOT!!
Only a select few couples were choosing bathroom tile, and comparing paint chips with one of my dearest and I on a Saturday night.
If I were you, I would bookmark my genius suggestion for next Valentine's Day evening, when you want to escape a bar full of gropers.
SHoooot - I'll even help you carry home that 20lbs. bag of potting soil!!

CREEPED OUT!

WHO DOES THIS!!!!!?!?!?!?!??!!!

Love Love Love Love....

Instead of showing us what sucks about Valentine's Day (re: above), I will drape my wonderful blog with things that make my heart not split in half.....

Rodel LA
MADONNA!!!
Diana Vreeland's flawless everything
expensive things
conversely - stuff that wouldn't get me laughed at

a pre-valentine's day gift from me to you

duh

growgrowgrowgrowgrowgrowgrowgrow

1pm. Numb face. AGAIN.

WORST MAN ON THE FACE OF THE PLANET!!!!!!!!!!!!!

daily puppy

My mom is probably the furthest thing from computer literate, and my dad likes to mess with her, almost on a daily basis.
She understands the power button, and she knows how to drag the mouse on over to the Internet Explorer icon.
But when she's used to Google being her homepage, and my dad has taken it upon himself to change it to daily puppy....SHIT'S GONNA FLY!!!!!!!!!!!
Have you been to this site?!
It's as if time has suspended itself, and all we're left to look at are pictures of tubby young pups frolicking in the snow.

family gatherings

I'm envious of those of you who are friends with members of your extended family.
I've heard stories of cousins being best friends with one another, or tales of how you went to your aunts house for the weekend..."just to hang."
This afternoon, for the first time in about 10 years, my family was invited to a "reunion" of sorts.
My mom's side of the family is full of successful post-baby boomers, who hold their high power jobs in super high regard.
Topics of conversation over the course of a few hours went something like this:
- luxury cars
- time shares
- how many hockey/basketball games everyone has been to this season
- renovations
- golf courses in Ontario
Maybe it was all the talk of upcoming opportunities to buy out a percentage of an outsiders timeshare, or maybe it was my super uncomfortable, super conservative outfit that was very forcefully suggested that I wear to this event - but MAN WHADDASNORE!!!!
I had hopes for one member of the family, a cousin who plays jazz guitar (you've gotta work with what you're given, ok?!?!) - but perhaps in the years since we've been formally invited to a family function, he's changed his opinions on life.

I need a gym buddy ASAP

For some reason the bitter cold just makes me want to go home after a long day of work, and eat pasta.
MY NEW YEARS RESOLUTION ISN'T WORKING OUT, AND IT'S SCARING MEEEE!!!!!!!
I ONLY HAVE UNTIL JUNE TO GET BACK TO MY ORIG. WEIGHT, AND I'M NERVOUS THAT I WILL COMPLETELY FAIL!!!!!
Ever noticed that the second you have it in your mind that you want a particular item (flat stomach, new ipod, KFC), you get on the subway and EVERYONE has what you want!?!?!
This morning I boarded my subway car, feeling totally Michelin man in my puffy sweater/huge jacket combo, and somehow EEEVVVVEEERRRYYYYOOOONNNEEEEE else seemed to look totally svelte in their winter gear.


SICK

OF

IT

!!!!!

duuuuuuuuuuuude!

I ALMOST FORGOT!!!!

Luxurious items in U.S. dollars

I'm staying at my parents this weekend, as both of their birthdays happen to be one after another.
SWEET!!
After the initial "home for the weekend" routine has taken place (long hot bath, laundry, scour the fridge for expensive cheeses), the next step is to sit with the family in the living room, and catch up with my good friend catalogue.
Restoration Hardware
Neiman Marcus
Horchow
Hammacher Schlemmer
I'm busy for hours, looking at things I could never afford!

In other news, cutting my hair is a thing of the past.
Soon, my mammoth hair will swallow my neck, and the only accessory I will need is conditioner.